So, I’m pregnant.
It comes with a funny story as to how I finally figured it out….
So as you are processing (heck, me too, I’m still in shock)….I’ll tell you the story.
I’m constantly paranoid that I am pregnant, and it seems like I am taking tests every other month, so I finally went online and bought pregnancy test strips- 15 for $15 bucks, so that I would save money and not have to buy the $20 store bought ones.
I thought this was a GREAT idea, and I thought these 15 strips would last me like a life-time, right?
Well, then I started to get REALLY tired. So tired that I was falling asleep on the couch sitting up in the afternoon, right after my afternoon coffee with two kids jumping on me and going crazy. It just wasn’t my normal-going on no sleep- mom of 2-tired. It was ridiculous fatigue. So much so that it scared me, I thought something was wrong with me.
Then I thought- OR I could be pregnant. Checked my calender, and realized that there was that one time that was close to a fertile day.
So, then I was convinced I was pregnant. As soon as I was 5 days before my missed period, I took the test.
Okay? So, maybe it’s too early to test?
Then my period doesn’t come.
So, I take the test again…
Now I’m kinda worried, because these are fancy early detection pregnancy tests, and if I was pregnant they would DEFINITELY tell me, so what the heck is wrong with me?
I’m never late on my period, but I thought- I’ll just get it tomorrow- but I never did.
A couple of days later I have an appointment with my herbalist to try and figure out what the heck is wrong with me.
And she muscle tests me and says, “I’m testing that your HCG levels are rising”.
I say, “Well, why would my HCG levels be rising if I wasn’t pregnant, does it rise for any other reason?”
“No. It’s only for pregnancy. I think you should take another test.”
So, I put her on hold, take another test- NEGATIVE.
She can’t figure it out, she tests everything, and doesn’t really know what is wrong with me. Has me do some other stuff, and once that is taken care of we can test again later. I’m super bummed, because she honestly has never NOT had an answer for me…. and I still don’t know what is wrong with me.
So then, fast forward (and many negative tests later), and I am 13 days late. I go to take ANOTHER test (because I have a bunch, thank goodness)…. and it’s negative again.
Except the “test” line is a little darker then usual….so I pull out the directions and they say that the test line has to be just as dark as the control line.
The top of the page of the directions I’ve been reading this whole time say….
Ovulation Test Directions
What the heck? How did I not notice this before? Why would it say ovulation test? DID I BUY OVULATION TESTS INSTEAD OF PREGNANCY TESTS???!
I scramble in a panic to try and find the box, and it says “Pregnancy Tests”.
So, I KNOW I bought the right thing.
But why would they send me directions for ovulation tests?
Then I realize, that there is writing on the BACK of the paper. I turn it over and it says this:
THIS IS the pregnancy test strip directions.
So, they basically just send you one paper, and then based on what you bought, they expect you to be smart enough to read the right side!
I never looked at this side! I thought it was just directions in another language or something! GAH! I’m such an idiot! (Is it too early to blame pregnancy brain, and hormones, no?)
So, then I look at the directions for the pregnancy tests, and it says if there is ANY line on the test line…
YOU ARE PREGNANT.
So I grab the paper freaking out and run to Wade in his office and say “I HAVE TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING!!”
He is shocked, can’t believe it. He says, “Sooo, you’re pregnant?”
I say, “NO! I don’t know! I need to go to the store and buy the expensive digital that will tell me PREGNANT!”
He reluctantly agrees, I rush to the store, come home, and try and pee on the dang stick, but I CAN’T because I just peed on a stick! I got like a drop out and I got an “error” message on the digital screen. DANGIT!
So, I drink like a gallon of water…..wait 30 minutes….drink again….then I pee TOO MUCH, and get another dang ERROR message!!
So, I’m trying to convince Wade to let me go spend another $20 bucks on another pregnancy test.
He’s like “Babe, I think it’s pretty safe to say you are pregnant.”
I call my Sister (because I called her on my way to the store the first time and filled her in)….she says to me,
“So, you are 13 days late, and you have 8 positive pregnancy tests? CONGRATS!”
So, I never got that final closure, of the awesome digital confirmation that says, “PREGNANT”!
I keep waking up feeling like my period is going to start… but I guess I can officially say it!
I’m 6 weeks pregnant, Due November 2nd.